Can someone tell me this: Why a grown woman would celebrate her “love story” at an amusement park? They remind me of a 90s high school couple going to Great America after the senior prom, minus the matching Cross Color outfits. [If you are from the Midwest, don’t even front like you don’t know what I am talking about.)

This charade is upsetting me. Not because I am single and bitter, but because it’s another example of fake Black Hollywood love that is forced down our throats. We see it with Denzel and Paulette, we saw it with Essence‘s cover of Kim and Diddy and now these fools, who just met five minutes ago and now are madly in love. The spectacle of it all.

Honest love my ass. Please, Diddy has a better chance of convincing me that he is finally going to marry Kim than Mariah does of proving that her nuptials are not a scam.

This reminds me of an episode of Sex and The City, when Bitsy Von Muffling, a middle-aged socialiate sent Carrie a wedding announcement stating she was marrying Bobby Fine, a known gay piano bar singer. Miranda says:

“We’re adults, we can handle it. Bitsy should say ‘I am getting older and want companionship’ and Bobby should say,”the hot guys just don’t go for me anymore.’ But to print out invitations and call it love, like love transforms people and molecules…well that’s just bullshit.”

Mariah just say no one else wants to mess with you anymore because you are proven certifiable and Nick just admit that you staying relevant has become increasingly difficult ever since…well the beginning of your career. If the two of you don’t agree with my assesments, fine, admit to something else and stop lying to educated people.

Meanwhile gay couples who actually love each other and have children together still can’t get married in most states, but I can marry my second cousin if I wanted to. Something doesn’t seem right about that.